Confidence II

I have been thinking about this subject. And I hope I can give some tips to you all, who are feeling insecure from time to time.

If you have a friend to talk to, then talk with her/him.
Talk with them, and tell them what's on your mind. What makes you feel insecure? Your friends understand you, and always manage to make you feel better. It’s always good to know someone supports you.

Be as positive as you can get.
Try to avoid self-pity, and think of your strong points and qualities.
Think of what you want to achieve. And think of all the things that make you happy. Don't allow yourself to use any harsh words that you may feel about yourself.

Write something you like about yourself the most on a piece of paper. Or, write it down in a diary.And whenever you feel down, just look at all the nice things you wrote about yourself. It will cheer you up. Or perhaps, let some of your friends write something down for you. What they like about you. Sweet words never failed making me feel loved! You should try it! ♥

Try not to think about what other people may think of you.
This may be difficult, I know. I face the same problem every now and then.
You know when you imagine what some place is going to be like before you go there, but when you get there it is totally different to your imagination?
It seems that it turned out not so bad most of the time! It will be alright!

Try to ignore what people say about you. You are not wearing Lolita for them, but for yourself.
You must wear it for you, and only you. You really don’t have to please others. If that would be the case, you would’ve worn a pair of boring jeans instead, like most people  ;)

Try to look confident. If you look insecure people will tell, and you will become an easy target. If you look confident about yourself, and walk around with a smile on your face, people seem to become more friendly towards you.

The walk. You can tell allot about a person when you look how the person walks.
Is it slow, tired? Or energetic and faster? People with confidence seem to walk quickly.
Also, try to stand up straight, keeping your head up, and try to make eye contact. it will make you look more confident.

Compliment other people. When you are feeling down, you reflect your feeling towards others, wheter you want it or not. If you try to stay positive and talk nicely to others and give a compliment every now and then you will see how happy it can make a person. If you see other people happy, you will become more happy yourself.

Don't stop. Times can get hard, when you want to give up.
But please, don't. Don't ever give up. If there is something you love, something you are passionate about, then don't stop. Try to follow your dreams. It's something you are looking forward to. Dreamers chart their own course and destiny. Dreamers are always striving to be the person they were meant to be and are not afraid to be different. Something you are willing to fight for.

And remember, nobody is perfect.
Even people who seem to look confident have moments when they feel insecure. Everybody has flaws.  And everyone makes a mistake. That’s normal. But it’s ok for you not to be perfect. I think most of us try to hide our flaws. I certainly don’t like talking about mine to just anyone. It rarely benefits you to talk about your flaws with prospects, with clients, with audiences. And yet, flaws are such a big part of what we are.

Keep in mind that you are a wonderfull person. You really are. An amazing and kind person.
Believe in yourself. Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. ♥ I am here to tell you that there is another way. It’s not for everyone. It’s not the only way. It’s not the easier way. Actually, it is more likely to be the harder way. But I guarantee you it is the best way. It is simply this – be yourself.

Confidence

Confidence.

It's something you need if you want to wear lolita.

And I know it may be hard, especially for a first time, to go out in public while wearing lolita.

It's something you need to get used to. Perhaps the best way to start with wearing lolita, is to take little steps.Wether you want to wear it at school, meet-ups, every day or maybe even work (depends on job).

~☆~☆~Starting~☆~☆~

You can start with wearing some hair accesories, or a subtle headbow.

After that perhaps a skirt or dress, without a petticoat, so that people can get used to it first.

I would say, go for a more casual dress or skirt, possibly without a outstanding print, or no print at all.

Go for a casual look if you want to get used at going out with a frilly dress for the first time.

After a while, when people are getting more used to your look, you can wear a petticoat underneath. Wearing a lolita blouse or a bolero, and some matching shoes.

Also, in my experience, when wearing lolita in school, it may be best to wear some cheap lolita clothing, such as Bodyline. Because it may get dirty. Or, if you want to wear it everyday to school, it's cheaper, so you can buy more clothing. That's what I did. If I wore some bodyline skirts, so that I didn't have to be so protective towards my clothing getting dirty and such. But, I also wore my beloved crosses dress (which was also my first outfit to wear to school). I also wore a white Btssb coat several times (I sold it a long time ago), but it wasn't a succes, because it gets dirty so fast at school.

~☆~☆~My experience~☆~☆~

I'm not sure if this all work, because when I decided I wanted to wear lolita to school the first time, I went for the complete look. I wore the whole thing, a dress with petticoat, matching headdress..

My friends all loved it. That I wore something I wanted to wear. Something that made me happy.

Of course there are always some people who don't like it, and even call out names and such.

But, not so much. Keep in mind I went to a graphic school, with alot of 'different' looking people.

Alot of gothics, cybers and skaters..and of course, the 'normal' people :p

I didn't really care, because I have been dressing differently from all the 'other people' for years.

I went from a alto/skater look to more gothic, and later on lolita.

And because I was surrounded by a few friends who liked it, I felt safe. If that makes any sense..

I think I would be a easy target if I didn't had any friends and was all alone.

But when I look back, I was still feeling a bit unsecure when I first started out wearing lolita.

Over these years I gained much more confidence, because I got more used to wearing it. And I didn't look insecure on the outside anymore, or, not that much as I used to do. That also helps.

Try to look confident, if you do, people seem to call lesser than usual. Or perhaps you won't notice anymore.

But, I also think it helped me that I got friends in the lolita community, because you know you won't be alone. There are more people who love this fashionstyle, and can be supportive for you.

The more friends I got, and the closer I got with them, the more secure I felt. 

For the people who want to wear it the first time, good luck!

Keep your head high, and know that you are not alone ♥

 ~☆~☆~

How was your experience when you first wore lolita in public?

Seeing blue

 And here is yet again a outfit post. I think this skirt may be my favourite skirt...

I've been loving these tights alot lately!

Outfit Rundown:

Blouse: Angelic Pretty

Skirt: Alice and the Pirates

Tights: Ebay

Shoes: Moi-Même-Moitié

Hair accesories: H&M/ Bijoux Brigitte

Rings: H&M/Handmade/Action/Gift from bf~♥

Necklace: Offbrand

Wig: MintyMix

And the video~

I need to get over myself and try to talk in the camera, so I will start practice.

So weird~

 If I will start a vlog, what would you guys want to know?

I would have to start with making a introduction.

Anyway, I hope you all like this outfit!

Even though I already have posted a very simulair outfit like this:

I will be gone this weekend, because my boyfriend and I need to relax.

Things are getting pretty stressfull here and with work, so then you know it's time to leave things behind and try to relax a bit. We will stay the weekend at my grandma's.

And hopefully I will make some photo's of my stay there.

At least I have something to look forward to, finally riding on our motorcycle again ♥
And seeing my sweet grandma again, who will treat us with amazing food!

Gosh, I love food so much *nomnomnom*

And this monday I will have a job interview, wish me luck!

I'm so nervous for interviews, and always afraid people won't hire me because I tend to look nervous at these talks. I need this, because I want to move out of this madness!

And, I found a old interview back I did for Blikvoer on youtube, so you can hear me talk :p

It's in Dutch unfortunantly!

I was extremely shy back then, even worse than now.

And I didn't know I was going to be filmed in the first place, just an interview.
So I was a bit in shock when I saw the big camera. And you can see that I feel a bit uncomfortable. I was having some physical problems back then, which aren't over yet, but I'm doing alot better right now.

I looked it back yesterday, and I saw how much I changed since then!

This was filmed a year ago, and I'm wearing my very first wig there, because I had really short hair. I didn't owned alot of brand like I do now, instead I mostly owned commisions and Bodyline! I didn't used alot of make-up,fakelashes or (hair)accesories. You can see how much I have growned, and I'm really trying to have a own style. Not sure if I do have my own style, but I like to think that ^^

In the video you will see me, and another Dutch lolita.

Who speaks mostly, because I couldn't properly talk due to my nervousness xD

I really need to gain more confidence..

Wow, I actually have a longer post this time, but I suppose it's compensation for my lack of posting this upcoming weekend.

I hope you all will have a wonderfull weekend. And thank you all for reading my blog and follow me. I appreciate it alot ♥ And a special thanks for all the people who leave sweet comments for me to read. I love you girls!! You make me feel loved, and inspire me to do my best and keep on posting!